What if we parented the way Jesus lived as Messiah? Consider His approach to preparing His church to function in the world. He did the following, and we can apply these lessons to our parenting life:
- He set an extremely high bar. God’s people were already failing miserably at keeping the Law. Add to that the requirements of tradition piled on by religious leaders, and it becomes an essentially impossible standard to meet. Then Jesus step onto the stage and ratchets it up a few more notches. You’ve heard it said (Law of Moses plus added traditions)…but I say to you…Whenever you read those words from Jesus, you know what’s coming. Outward behavior isn’t enough; God cares about your thought life, what happens in your heart.
I remember my mother teaching me from a very young age that God was with me at the heart level. She imparted wisdom to me with whispers like, “Ask God what He thinks about it,” and “God is your closest friend, so talk to Him.” A childhood of consistent comments like those prepared me for a close walk with God, once I returned from my rebellious, prodigal years. As I think now, that training laid the foundation of my relationship with God and may have been the most important discipleship lesson anyone ever taught me.
- He taught grace. Grace would officially be established at the cross, where Jesus paid our sin debt so we could receive forgiveness and eternal life. But He introduced grace in the years of ministry before His crucifixion. Brilliantly setting an adulterous woman free from her accusers, revealing to an outcast woman on the outskirts of Sychar and healing a man born blind, whose blindness the culture assumed was the result of sin, are just three examples of the foreign concept called grace that Jesus exemplified for us, His followers.
It’s counterintuitive to most parents that we should show grace to our kids. We have to prepare our children to face the consequences of their actions, motivating them to make wise choices whose consequences will be favorable; how do we do that by letting them off the hook? Well, first, grace is not devoid of reaping what we sow (Galatians 6:7). Also, New Covenant grace includes God disciplining His children, chastising those He loves (Hebrews 12:6). The important thing for parents is to always teach kids that acts of discipline have the purpose of helping them grow up to be good and wise adults, that spankings and such are carried out because we love them and want them to be the person God wants them to be.
- He set the example of sacrifice. If anyone was unsure of whether Jesus laid down His life willingly, the resurrection should’ve cleared that up. Overcoming death in the grave proved that He could’ve prevented death from occurring in the first place. There was a reason He was crucified. It wasn’t because He had no choice, but because it was necessary, willed and prophesied for God’s system of justice to be satisfied as He extended mercy through His Son. Everything about the Messiah was sacrificial – that He came to earth, becoming human, that He was laid in a manger as a newborn, that He was despised by Jews, rejected by religious leaders and tortured by the Roman government. Ultimately, His final breaths were obedient acts of sacrifice for all who would believe in Him.
Anyone who’s been in the parenting game very long at all knows that it’s a life of sacrifice. Mothers endure pain as they carry and as they birth the child. Then, sleep is lost, personal preferences are given up and the sacrifice of work and provision become the order of the day. So, parents unwilling to sacrifice are deemed irresponsible on some level. When we struggle to sacrifice willingly, we parents can follow Jesus’ example of compassionate sacrifice for our children whom we love.
There are three of the ways Jesus’ ministry can help us with parenting. I’m sure there are many others, but these can help us today.
I hope you find them helpful.
