Author: gabrieltew

The answer to the question why depends on who’s asking it. 

Jesus was walking through the city of Jerusalem with His disciples when they saw a man blind from birth. 

“Why,” they asked Jesus, “was this man born blind?”

Their why meant “what was the cause?” 

But Jesus often answered the question that should’ve been asked, rather than the one actually asked. And that’s what He did in this case. 

The disciples were concerned with the cause of the man’s blindness. At best, they wanted wisdom to understand so they could teach others how to avoid such plights as a life of blindness. At worst, they wanted to know who was at fault, whom to blame.

Jesus wasn’t interested in whose fault it was. He hadn’t come from Heaven to earth to condemn us, but that through Him we might be saved. 

So, Jesus, instead of answering the whose-fault-is-this question, answered the what’s-the-purpose-of-this question. 

And the answer was, “so that the works of God can be seen.”

And then Jesus healed the man.

I believe this is more than an isolated incident. I believe this story, found in the 9^th chapter of John’s gospel, reveals to us a principle of God.

As I found myself in the hospital 3 ½ years ago, unable to walk or swallow, one of the questions everybody was asking was “what caused this?” 

I wasn’t a candidate for stroke. I was fairly healthy – my diet was healthy, I exercised regularly, didn’t use nicotine or any substances, didn’t have a high level of stress and stroke wasn’t in  my family history. 

The neurosurgeon said my carotid was extremely dissected, leading him to believe I had been in a car accident or had some kind of trauma to my neck.

Nothing like that had occurred, so nobody had an answer for what caused the stroke.

However, God has shown me over time that the stroke did have a purpose. 

I won’t get into whether the stroke was caused or merely allowed by God. Again, cause isn’t my concern, but purpose is. 

Scripture teaches that God causes all things to work together for the good of those who love Him and embrace His purpose. We also know from His Word that everything exists to bring Him glory. 

So God is causing my stroke to produce good for me and glory for Him. That’s His purpose and I’m more than ok with it. 

What good looks like in my situation is that I’m more intimate with God than I’ve ever been before. I haven’t been able to open the fingers on my left hand in almost 43 months; also in that time, 80% of my musical abilities have vanished. Those are two painful losses for me, but God has more than offset them with the close friendship He’s fostered with me. Every time I’ve felt the pain of loss in my post-stroke life, the Spirit of God has whispered to me, “I’m here with you; draw close.” 

So for me, God’s purpose has brilliantly trumped any sense of cause.

I’m pretty sure the blind man would say the same.

Ask a group of non-church-going people their opinion of church people and one of the common answers will be that we are judgmental and hypocritical. Whether the description is accurate or merely perceived from individual to individual, there’s no doubt that both judgmentalism and hypocrisy exist in the body of Christ on some level. And neither should exist at all.

On that issue, I want to address three individuals or groups:

1. To Jesus-followers who make up today’s body of Christ (the church): My brothers and
sisters, if we are honest with ourselves, we all know we have failed in this. How can we
expect to influence people toward Jesus if we aren’t allowing Him to influence us? Why
do we judge those outside the body when we live even less Godly lives, ourselves? Any
righteous and productive judgment must begin with each one of us judging ourselves by
the standard of God’s Word. Then maybe we’ll be in a condition for God to use us the
way He wants to, as reflections of His light.

2. To Jesus: Lord, we confess with sorrow that the very sins you addressed most directly as
You established Your church we are still committing, despite the reality that You now
live in us. We have no excuse; we have Your teaching in the New Testament and Your
Spirit dwelling in our hearts constantly directing us away from those sins and into grace-
thinking toward other people. The complaints of the world haven’t gotten our attention,
nor have the tears of those we’ve hurt.
In the same breath, we both request and receive the forgiveness You make available by
Your abundant grace. We also request help from our Helper; Your help has been in play
for us, but because of our extreme weakness, we ask that You help us even more with
our relatively tiny role of cooperating with the leading of Your Spirit.

3. To onlookers who haven’t yet joined the body of Christ: Two things I want to say to you.
First, we’re sorry for any way you’ve been mistreated by the church. We misrepresented
Jesus in every occurrence that lacked love and kindness on our part. Nevertheless,
please don’t judge who Jesus is by our poor behavior. He’s given us both strength to
walk well and forgiveness when we don’t. So while we’re forgiven and refuse to walk in
the guilt that He’s removed with His own sacrifice, we will endeavor to treat you with
more kindness going forward.
Additionally, please allow me the boldness to say that since you aren’t perfect either,
and stand in need of forgiveness for your own shortcomings, please prayerfully consider
joining us in faith in Jesus. As I stated, we have both strength by His Spirit to live in the right way, and His forgiveness when we come up short. That’s an incomprehensible
double blessing and is what everyone needs more than anything. So please allow Jesus
to make Himself real to you and be ready to trust Him with your eternal future when He
does. And when you come into the body of Christ by faith in Jesus, please don’t be judgmental or hypocritical.

Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. – Matthew 5:5

Meek means humble by choice. Meekness is best expressed in the life of Jesus. The best expression of the concept in words we find in 1 Peter 5:6 Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, and in due time He will exalt you. Let’s examine the verse exegetically. 

Humble. The literal meaning of the original from which the word derives is dirt. It depicts the most base level of form and position possible. Imagine the soldier doing the pit crawl under barbed wire. There you have it, the image for humble.

Yourselves. Someone can be humbled by an outside force, but God calls for it to be voluntary, that we voluntarily take the position ourselves. Actually, He’s calling us to be humble of heart. It’s possible to be humbled outwardly and still stubbornly maintain a heart of pride. Most important is that our attitudes involve humility, regardless of the externals.

Under the mighty hand of God. God’s mighty hand over us means, first, that he protects us. Humility in the Lord is the safest possible scenario for us. Becoming antsy and squirming our way into a seemingly higher position only opens us up to danger. Secondly, God’s protective hand serves as a barrier that keeps us close to Him where we can remain in increasing intimacy with Him and hear His voice that speaks life. 

In due time. Who gets to decide when something is due? The one in authority. The teacher, the mortgage company, electric company and the judge. The highest authority in the universe, under whose protective and directive hand we wait, is the one who sets the due date for our graduation from the low to the high. His judgment is perfect and His timing perfectly trustworthy.

He will. God calls us to patiently humble ourselves, but He’s the one who does the lifting. Troubles ensues when we try to take His job and expect Him to do ours. And it’s meaningful the verb tense. He will…when?…He will…why hasn’t He?…He will…Why can’t I?…He will. Be patient, because He will. 

Exalt you. God will, according to His will, lift us to the place He’s planned since the beginning for us to be. He exalts us for two purposes.

First, He exalts us to be honored. We don’t deserve it, but He bestows it upon us anyway. He didn’t lift David from the sheep pastures to the throne of His chosen people because he deserved it; He chose him based on His own divine desire to bless him. No person deserved the lifting to Israel’s throne, but God lifted them anyway. We won’t be exalted because of our qualifications, but because of His. Jesus’s exaltation is the only deserving one. Yet ours is promised.

The second reason for God’s exaltation of people is that He has work for us to do. In Joshua 7 we see what sometimes happens when we humble ourselves. Joshua and the elders of Israel were distraught from the defeat of their people, so they fell on their faces before the presence of God all day long. 

After Joshua cried out from his troubled heart, God uttered two words: Get up. The Lord had some work for them to do that would eradicate the source of their distress. We can’t forget that what may follow our time of humility may be, as He lifts us up, a work order from the Lord.

Jordan heard the knock on the doorpost of his home. “Coming!” As he neared the doorway, he could see the figure of a man but could not make out his face as the sun shone from directly behind the silhouette, effectively blinding Jordan.

“I come with an invitation.” said the man to whom the silhouette belonged before Jordan could get into position to converse with him.

“Invitation from Whom?” Jordan did not appreciate the interruption, but his curiosity was piqued. 

“The lost son of my lord, Elam of Ramoth-Gilead, has returned to the immensely pleasant surprise of his father. The fattened calf is being prepared as we speak and shall be served at dusk today, sir. It would make Elam most joyful to have you, your wife and your son in attendance.”

“I had heard that son was dead,” said Jordan from a surprised but elated heart for his beloved friend, Elam.

“That was our fear, sir, but fortunately, that fear has this day been dispelled.”

“It would be my great honor to attend and celebrate this most joyful turn of events, but you do understand this is very short notice.”

I do indeed, as does my lord, Elam, but I do not wish to understate the addition to Elam’s bliss – yea, to that of his entire household – that your presence would make, my lord, Jordan.”

With such honor and respect exuding from the mouth of Elam’s servant, the urgency of the merchants’ order Jordan had spent all day pouring over was falling to a lower and lower priority by the second. Of course! He had to attend! This was one of his closest friends and most respected business associates, and his son who had also been a close companion to his own son, had in essence returned from the dead. The merchants’ order would be filled tomorrow, This was a day of celebration!

“Prepare my steed and carriage,” Jordan said to his stable hand. 

“Immediately, sire.” The steward turned and walked toward the stable to accommodate his master’s desire.

Jordan, his wife, Abigail, and their son, Nathan, sat in the carriage as their driver navigated through the network of roads to Elam’s estate. 

“When did the boy return?” Abigail asked about Elam’s long-lost son.

“Just this morning. That is why the invitation came with such short notice. I can only imagine being in Elam’s shoes. It is rumored that your son is dead, then much to your surprise, you see him walking the path to return home. The servant bringing the invitation said Elam ran toward his son when he saw him, fell on his neck in joyful tears and brought him to the house, called all his household together and officially reinstated his position in the family.”

Abigail fought back tears as she tried to speak. “Every time I heard mention of Elam’s son being lost to him I thanked Jehovah that our Nathan has remained faithful and wise.” Abigail lifted her eyes to meet Nathan’s who sat opposite her and Jordan in the carriage. 

Nathan’s eyes dropped as he fought back tears of his own. Seconds later he had gathered himself just enough to speak. “It is hard to believe my prayers for Andrew have finally been answered.”

“You prayed for him to come home?” asked his father.

“I prayed for him to succeed.”

“I am not sure that is the prayer that was answered,” Abigail said, having heard he returned home penniless with the hope that his father would accept him as a servant on his  estate. 

“His life is not over. There are still many years for success in his future,” Nathan argued respectfully to his mother. “For now, being safe and with his family is success.“ Abigail found it comforting that her son, the same age as Andrew, saw value in being with family.

“Yes,” Jordan agreed, “If God is willing, Andrew has a long life still ahead of him to achieve all kinds of success, as do you, my son.”

The carriage followed the steed onto the driveway leading to Elam’s house. Music was playing from behind the house accompanied by the smell of beef and cheers of Elam’s friends. As they followed the cart path around to the back of the house, they saw the crowd of guests and the fire roasting the calf. Wine was being poured into the cups of all the guests as many of them tore bread and dipped it into bowls of olive oil, eating and laughing together. 

Jordan and his family stepped down from their carriage. Nathan spotted Andrew across the lawn and quick-stepped excitedly over toward him; Jordan and Abigail found an unassuming place among the guests and received bread and wine.

Nathan and Andrew embraced, kissing each other on their cheeks and laughing that they were together again after two long years. “You’re home!” Nathan said with a full-faced smile.

“Yes, home! It is so good to see you, my friend!”

“I am sorry to interrupt the reconciliation of best friends,” Elam interjected as he stepped in and placed his hands on his son’s shoulders, “but it is time for the most joyful announcement.” 

Elam led Andrew onto the veranda where servants placed a robe on Andrew’s shoulders and had him sit so that they could place special shoes onto his feet. Then his father took him by the hand, gently lifting it as Andrew stood in response. Elam slid the family signet ring onto Andrew’s finger that signified his full restoration of sonship and authority in the estate. Then, Elam, still holding the hand of his son, turned to face their guests, “Thank you all, my friends, for your presence at this most joyous occasion. For Jehovah has brought my son home! He was dead but is now alive. He was lost but he is home again. Please, eat, drink, thank God for His goodness and honor my son in his return and restoration!”

“He was lost, but now he is found.” So the party began. – Luke 15:24

There was a time when many of Jesus’ disciples left and followed Him no more. Here’s why. First, they had taken offense at the truth He spoke in addressing their selfish desires. 

We know from Proverbs 18:19 that, once someone is offended, it’s very difficult to turn their heart back toward their offender.  Every time the Lord brings correction to us, we have a critical decision to make. We’ll either resist or cooperate. 

The people in the latter half of John 6, who’d been among the five thousand Jesus fed miraculously the day before, followed Jesus vigorously, circumventing the Sea of Galilee in pursuit of Him. Passionately seeking after Jesus seems like a good thing, right?

But their purpose in pursuing Him was that He would provide another meal for them. And that’s the truth that offended them so badly. 

Once offended, the people’s hearts were thrown into confusion. And once confused, they were  unwilling to  receive the words of life He spoke to them. 

Confuse means to attach together (con = together; fuse = attach). When two things are fused together, one can no longer tell them apart. The John 6 people couldn’t tell the difference between the message of Jesus and the pagan practice of drinking blood and consuming human flesh. Jesus’ John 6 stated requirement to drink His blood and eat His flesh was confusing to me until I understood what He meant by it.

As Jesus sensed disciples turning away, He asked His twelve if they also wanted to leave Him. Simon Peter, as spokesman for the group, had the right response. He said, in essence, “We may not understand what You said either, but we do understand who You are; You’re the Christ, the Son of God, and we know You have the words of eternal life.”

Perhaps they didn’t fully understand until their last meal with Jesus, during Passover, when He explained – and the next day demonstrated – that the cup and the bread represented the submission of one’s very life to the will of God. 

Whenever it was that the twelve really got what Jesus meant by His blood and His flesh, they could tell the difference between His words and the practice of pagans. At that point, they could discern.

Discern means to tell the difference between one thing and another. Discernment is an antonym of confusion. 

Simon Peter’s answer to Jesus exemplifies for us the discernment we need in our faith walk with Jesus. We may not understand every single thing along the journey, but we understand the most important thing, that Jesus is God the Son, the Christ worthy of our trust. Whatever we’re yet to understand must not trump our knowledge of who Jesus is. Ultimately, what we really need to remember is that Jesus is who the Bible says He is. 

Once we grasp that truth, we cannot relinquish it, regardless of how confusing situational details may appear. Holding on to the correct identity and rightful position of Christ will clarify whatever confusion arises like a strong wind blowing away a dense fog.

We Jesus followers are at a decided advantage in the midst of this culture of confusion. We have a clarity of perspective by virtue of our relationship with Jesus. He clears up all confusion for us.

So let us let us discern through the lens of God’s Word. For we need not be confused. 

Several reasons exists as to why married couples need Jesus to be the Lord of their relationship. To begin with, there’s the very purpose for which God established marriage: to reflect Himself. 

Jimmy Evans illustrates this by zeroing in on the statement God made in the beginning, “Let Us make mankind in Our own image.” Who’s the Us and the Our? This is the first hint in Scripture that God is trinitarian, three in one. 

Pastor Evans brings three men on stage and stands them shoulder to shoulder to symbolize the Godhead. Then he brings up a married couple and points out that the husband (representing Adam) doesn’t look like the trinitarian Creator, then to the couple now standing together to show that they also don’t look like the triune God (the three guys). So far, marriage is not looking much like God.

Then Pastor Evans walks over and stands with his arms around the couple, illustrating clearly that God is the necessary third piece of a marriage to have it reflect God, as He intended. The real point is that marriage must include God if it is to reflect God. 

Another reason God – and more specifically, God the Son, Jesus – is the necessary third party in marriage is that marriage must have that one ingredient that only Jesus provides. Jesus came into our human world for the distinct purpose of availing that very ingredient to us. It’s the ingredient that saves each of us from our deserved judgment and  into life forever with God in His eternal Heaven. It’s the ingredient necessary for us to be free from the chains of bondage we forged with our sinfulness. It’s what Jesus alone brought to sinning people like me. It’s what we need most and cannot attain except with Jesus.

It’s grace. Grace eliminates the horror we deserve and provides generously the beauty we do not deserve. 

Grace is absolutely necessary for a great marriage; the intention of forgiving in advance whatever hurt a spouse may cause is the secret to having an awesome marriage. Every other approach to marriage will come up short and soon have the couple drowning in the quicksand of resentment and bitterness. 

Since grace is necessary for marriage and it cannot be found except in Jesus, its author, then Jesus is necessary for any marriage to be a good one. 

Some may say, “Wait, I agree that my marriage needs grace, but I disagree that I cannot produce the grace it needs without Jesus’ help.”

Well, I strongly disagree. But let’s assume for a moment that you’re right. You don’t need Jesus in your marriage because you can produce grace from your own heart and give it out freely to your spouse. In that case, you can have an awesome marriage without Jesus having a place in it.

Again, it is no more possible to produce grace apart from Jesus than to produce an elephant from a mouse. But if you could, and you could have a great marriage without Jesus, you still have no hope for eternity. You’ll have a great marriage on this earth. But once you and your spouse do by death finally part, you will enter into a forever long regret, because only through Jesus may you attain eternal life with God in Heaven. So, foolish spouse, you have gained the whole marital world, but lost your soul.

If you’re a person who hasn’t gone all in on Jesus, please realize that He is God’s answer to our sin problem. Start now believing in Him to make you right with God and to be reconciled with Him forever.

And simultaneously, allow Him the seat of honor in your marriage relationship. For He is that necessary third in marriage.

I did a project several years ago, matching up a verse of Scripture to every month and day in the year. For July 7^th (7/7), it’s Matthew 7:7 It can be called ASK Day, and I think it should be a recognized holiday, or holyday, maybe. Matthew 7:7 goes like this: Ask and you shall receive; seek and you shall find; knock and it shall be opened to you.

An important thing to know is that these verbs, ask, seek and knock, all three are in present imperative tense in the Greek manuscripts. That means these verbs are described as continuous actions, letting us know that we’re invited by God to keep our requests continually before him, rather than shooting Him an occasional quickie. 

Jesus, who spoke these words in His Sermon on the Mount, reiterated this point with a parable that’s recorded in Luke 18. There was a judge who had no love for God nor people, so fair and right judgment wasn’t his goal. However, there was a widow who came (present imperative tense) relentlessly before him, calling on him for justice in her case. 

The judge cared nothing about her having justice, yet he gave in and heard the case, just to bring an end to her annoying pleas. 

If a judge, explained Jesus, answered the request of someone he cared nothing about, can’t we bring, with confidence, to our loving Father, who desires to give us whatever we need, the requests on our hearts?

Some Bible publishers title this parable The Unjust Judge, but the title I prefer, which some publishers use, is The Persistent Widow. That title emphasizes the widow’s persistence above the poor character of the judge, and I think that’s more appropriate, as in keeping with Jesus’ lesson.

God retains His sovereignty in all matters, and as His submissive children, we defer to His will, actually ultimately preferring His will. Thus Paul, after three requests – each being lengthy, by my estimation – accepted God’s solution to his problem, a different solution than Paul had requested. And God’s only Son, Himself, accepted the Father’s will over His own after praying three times in Gethsemane (Luke 22).

So God’s Sovereign will always has the final say.

But then there was the Canaanite woman (Matthew 15) begging Jesus, then His disciples, then Jesus again, to help with her demon-possessed daughter. She was so persistent that she seemed to finally convince Jesus to do what He first had refused at to do. That story is probably the best real-life play-out of the principle of persistence in prayer – the ASK Principle.

And I believe God’s will is that we participate in many more real-life examples of the principle by asking, seeking and knocking with persistence.

So happy ASK Day! May we be reminded on this day to persistently seek God for our needs every day of the year!

9-year-old Simon dragged the freshly cut olive tree limb to his father’s shop. “Here is the last one, Father. I stripped all the shoots off. I delimbed the trunk but it was too heavy for me to bring to the shop.”

“You will be shouldering the trunks soon enough, my son.”  Rufus did welcome the idea of his son becoming a strong grown man who could carry a larger load of the family business, but he did not want to wish away his childhood. Besides, in four days, just after the Sabbath, Simon would travel with Rufus as he shipped a load of pulp across the Mediterranean. 

Rufus’ business supplied wood used for crucifixion crosses to governors throughout the Roman world. The shipment would be ready in two days, but Huldah, Rufus’ wife, was a Jew and insisted that Simon learn to observe the Sabbath and other Jewish traditions. 

There could be no working on the Sabbath, including delivering shipments. It was bad enough that Rufus supplied the Romans with a resource for their heinous persecution of her people, but to do it on their holy day was out of the question.

And life was much better for everyone when Huldah was happy.

“What is the destination for your current load?” Huldah asked Rufus as they and Simon shared the evening meal. She prayed his answer would not be the coast of Palestine.

“Cyprus,” Simon answered as he tore another piece of bread in two, gave one piece to Simon with a smile and began sopping his bowl with the other. “We will return three days after leaving.”

“Father, may I man the helm?” Simon always made this request of his father but seldom got a favorable answer in return.

Perhaps on our return trip, after our load is delivered.” Rufus knew how volatile the sea was and how easily the logs could roll off their small ship and into the water.

Most importantly, keep safe and dry.” Huldah was far more concerned about her son than about any logs the Romans would use to torture people.

——————————————————–

24-year-old Simon walked into his parents’ home. “ Mother, I’ll be leaving tomorrow with the shipment.”

But that will have you travelling back during Passover, will it not, my son?”

No, Mother, the shipment is going to Joppa. From there I will travel into Jerusalem for the Passover. Then I will return after the feast.”

You’ll be in Jerusalem for the Passover! Nothing could bring me greater joy! Oh, I am so very proud of you, son!”

“Thank you, Mother. I only wish you could be with me.” Simon knew that was not possible for his mother now, since she was advancing in years and declining in strength.

It’s ok, I will celebrate here in Cyrene with our Jewish brothers and sisters. I made my pilgrimage when I was younger, so I do not feel less fortunate.”

——————————————————–

Simon was just outside the crowded city of Jerusalem. Two full days on the ship and a very long day on a donkey, and he could feel every mile of the journey in his weary body. At least he would soon be reclining and enjoying the lamb, unleavened bread and wine of the feast, just another half mile to the eastern district of the city.

“You there!” A Roman soldier barked at Simon. 

Simon turned to see a grimaced face staring down on him. “Me?” He was used to dealing with Rome, not being demeaned by them.

“Carry His cross!” The soldier pointed to a man stumbling under the weight of a cross, struggling to get it up the hill. Simon could see that the man, almost naked, had been badly whipped and beaten and wore, pressed into his head, a crown crudely crafted from thorny vines. Simon rushed to the man’s aid, lifting the cross as he had done so many times during his workdays.

“Thank you, sir, you are most kind.” The man struggled to speak, yet His genuineness came through very clearly.

“For what crime are You being crucified?” Simon blurted from his curiosity.

“All of them.” Simon did not understand the answer but it was the truth.

Simon processed what those words could have meant as he carried the cross to the top of the hill where more Roman soldiers commanded him to lay it down. He laid the cross down and turned to walk away. As he made his way back down the hill and back toward the Zion Gate, Simon struggled to understand how he would be able to enjoy the feast. The sound of hammers slamming onto nails and the screams of the men they tortured was difficult to hear. But hours after the hammering stopped, in Simon’s mind echoed memories of the hundreds of trees he’d prepared for such executions. 

——————————————————–

Simon lay awake deep into the morning hours as he contemplated his abbreviated conversation days before with the battered man too exhausted to carry His cross. What crime? All of them. What could that mean. 

Talk had already reached Cyrene of a man crucified in Jerusalem during Passover who was now alive again. What could that be about? Perhaps Simon would learn more on his next delivery trip to the Eastern Mediterranean.

And as they were coming out, they found a man of Cyrene named Simon whom they compelled to carry His cross. – Matthew 27:32

The book I’ve gifted people more than any other is How Am I Smart? by Kathy Koch. The author recognizes that the question shouldn’t be “am I smart?” because we all are. Nor should it be, “how smart am I?” because that question cannot be answered accurately. 

The assertion is that we’re all smart, we just need to figure out in what way we’re smart. Kathy Koch uses the research of two Harvard professors to identify 8 types of intelligence, or “smarts.” These smarts may or may not line up with classroom smarts, the only type of smart we often acknowledge.

Ms. Koch offers these 8 smarts to help parents better understand their kids but it can help teachers better understand their students, as well as help anyone to better understand others and themselves. 

The 8 smarts are logic-smart, picture-smart, people-smart, self-smart, body-smart, nature-smart, music-smart and word-smart. I won’t go into the meaning of each; their mere names help, but reading the book is necessary to understand them fully.

My point here is not to divulge the 8 smarts as much as to activate the thinking that there are different ways people can be smart. It helps a person immensely to understand that they learn and function well in certain aspects so they can gain much needed self-confidence and accomplish more in their life.

Most importantly, I want to add two more smarts to the list. One of these two smarts is more important than any other, and as we raise our kids, as well as manage our own lives, this is the smart we most want them and us to have.

The two smarts I propose to add are world-smart and eternity-smart. The contrast between the two is greater than that of any of the other smarts and their respective counterparts. For example, a self-smart person will recognize they process thoughts better alone where they can internalize without distraction, whereas a people-smart person sees that they need to be around people more because they manage better in social settings and accomplish more through social interaction and external processing.

World-smart people are often considered the smartest people, but compared to their eternity-smart counterparts, their smart has parameters that block their access to a whole other world of wisdom and knowledge. For example, they can tell you all about physics and speak wisely about all things humanistic, but they know nothing about things after this world age, outside mortality or the order of things beyond this universe. 

All of Kathy Koch’s 8 smarts have advantages and disadvantages. But being eternity-smart allows us understanding of the truths God lays out for us about Himself, our enemy the devil and eternity, while giving us the clearest perspective of this life through the lens of eternity, making us actually smarter about this world than those who are only world-smart. But the world-smart, while they may be keen to the knowledge within the box of this age and system, are numb to the words and ways of God.

As we raise our kids and prepare them for life, let’s be sure to prepare them for eternal life. All these smarts are gained through a combination of genetics and environment. Eternity-smart is no exception. We’re all born with a need for eternal life and the capacity to understand that need and how to fill it with the gift of Jesus, thus the term childlike faith. As parents, we have the ability to train our kids up in that smart or to train it out of them, opting to train them to be world-smart instead. 

For a great lesson that helps us grow as an eternity-smart person, watch this:

Francis Chan Rope Illustration

Marriage takes effort. Every married couple knows that all too well. But as with other worthwhile endeavors, it’s often more important to work smart than to work hard. If our goal is to value our spouse (and it should be), it’s smart to designate significant time to meditating on our spouse. 

My use of the word meditation is different from many in our culture. The meditation I’m referring to is rumination, or giving repetitive consideration to a subject. 

Some animals, like cattle, chew the cud. Cud is partially digested food. I for one am glad humans don’t chew the cud. Gross!

But humans, more than any other animal, can ruminate mentally. Our thought process is often to rethink what we’ve thought about previously. A lot of our meditation we do without (pardon the ironic pun) even thinking about it.

Any Christ follower who wants to make the most of their walk with God will find it necessary to spend time meditating on His Word and in prayer. My early morning time alone with God gets my focus and attitude into a productive place; I’ve become so accustomed to that daily time that I’m practically addicted to having it.

I realized sometime back, though, that if I need meditation time to help me value a perfect and holy God and keep my relationship with Him strong, then I probably should spend some regular time meditating on the qualities of my wonderful, albeit imperfect wife. 

Here are three guidelines I recommend, and I’ll include some examples from my own spousal meditation:

1. Identify a strong character quality in your spouse. My wife has a very strong sense of commitment. For her, that means she’s dog-with-a-bone committed to God and to me, her husband. I see this everyday as she helps me accomplish things I cannot do alone. This light really shone brightly during my stroke recovery, when I had some serious limitations. She was and is tireless in whatever she’s committed to, and I’m super blessed to have her as my wife.

2. Identify a physical quality you love about your spouse. For my wife, it’s her lips. She has beautiful lips. It’s one of the features that attracted me to her thirty-seven years ago, and I still find myself captivated by them, especially when she’s talking.

3. Reflect on something your spouse has done recently that you appreciate greatly. My wife is truly a Proverbs 31 wife, and her modus operandi is to focus her efforts on entrepreneurial projects and to be industrious and productive in them. She holds Super Host status with Air B & B with our Coastal Country Cottage, which she renovated, marketed and now operates with the highest possible quality. She is also overseeing the renovation of a rental property we hope to soon sell at a profit and does so with the highest level of quality and style. All these projects she does without dropping a single degree the quality of the day to day family, church/ministry and professional responsibilities to which she’s committed herself.

One more suggestion: try not to compare your spouse to others. As I write this I can imagine readers comparing their spouse to mine. But God has given each person a unique set of qualities that renders them incomparable. Focus is the key, and as I quiz my five-year-old grandson, focus means thinking about how many things? One. So keep your focus on your spouse and their best qualities.

I highly recommend spousal meditation, and not just once but regularly. I promise that, just as our walk with God is made better by taking time to meditate on His awesome qualities, so will be the walks we’re in with our spouses as we add spousal meditation to our lifestyles.