Who’s the best father in the Bible? As I thought through the Biblical narrative this past Father’s Day weekend, I couldn’t think of a sterling example, other than the Heavenly Father, Himself. There isn’t all that much recorded, good or bad, about the fatherly practices of the Biblical paternal personalities. What is there, it seems, is mostly negative. Indeed, that’s one of the self-validating qualities of the Bible. If the human authors of the Bible weren’t writing the truth, wouldn’t they have cast themselves in a more impressive light? Jacob played favorites among his thirteen children, as did his father, Isaac, among his two. Lot offered up his two daughters to the evil men of Sodom to have their wicked way with them, protector not his strongest fatherly role. Saul once said to his son, Jonathan, “you stupid son of a whore”, not the best way to encourage your child. David had a son, Adonijah, whom he never disciplined, not even to ask, “Why are you doing that?” In the era of the divided kingdom, neither nation, Israel nor Judah, recorded a Godly king who actively prepared his son to succeed him as a Godly king. In the New Testament, Joseph, the earthly stepfather of Jesus, showed some strong qualities, like protecting his family when King Herod ordered all babies around Jesus’ age killed. But to find the winner of the Best Father Award, I had to look at someone who wasn’t a real person, at all. He’s a fictional character in one of Jesus’ best known parables. He does symbolize the Heavenly Father in the story, so he’s obviously a positive figure.
May I have the envelope?…Drum roll please….
And the winner is…
…the father of the prodigal son. His example is recorded in Luke 15:
Luke 15:11-31
To illustrate the point further, Jesus told them this story: “A man had two sons. 12 The younger son told his father, ‘I want my share of your estate now before you die.’ So his father agreed to divide his wealth between his sons.
13 “A few days later this younger son packed all his belongings and moved to a distant land, and there he wasted all his money in wild living. 14 About the time his money ran out, a great famine swept over the land, and he began to starve. 15 He persuaded a local farmer to hire him, and the man sent him into his fields to feed the pigs. 16 The young man became so hungry that even the pods he was feeding the pigs looked good to him. But no one gave him anything.
17 “When he finally came to his senses, he said to himself, ‘At home even the hired servants have food enough to spare, and here I am dying of hunger! 18 I will go home to my father and say, “Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, 19 and I am no longer worthy of being called your son. Please take me on as a hired servant.”‘
20 “So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him. 21 His son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son.’
22 “But his father said to the servants, ‘Quick! Bring the finest robe in the house and put it on him. Get a ring for his finger and sandals for his feet. 23 And kill the calf we have been fattening. We must celebrate with a feast, 24 for this son of mine was dead and has now returned to life. He was lost, but now he is found.’ So the party began.
25 “Meanwhile, the older son was in the fields working. When he returned home, he heard music and dancing in the house, 26 and he asked one of the servants what was going on. 27 ‘Your brother is back,’ he was told, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf. We are celebrating because of his safe return.’
28 “The older brother was angry and wouldn’t go in. His father came out and begged him, 29 but he replied, ‘All these years I’ve slaved for you and never once refused to do a single thing you told me to. And in all that time you never gave me even one young goat for a feast with my friends. 30 Yet when this son of yours comes back after squandering your money on prostitutes, you celebrate by killing the fattened calf!’
31 “His father said to him, ‘Look, dear son, you have always stayed by me, and everything I have is yours. (Luke 15:11-31, NLT)
Here are the qualities I see in this father:
- He was generous to his sons. When his younger son made the very bold request to receive his inheritance early, the dad accommodated his request. We could question the wisdom of the dad’s decision, but his gift to his son shows that generosity trumped distrust for his son, and answering his son’s request took priority over conservation of wealth. God hasn’t required perfect wisdom from me before giving me resources. He’s placed gifts into my hands knowing I would mismanage them. Surely, there are times when we say no to our children’s requests, but sometimes, like our Father, we’ll place resources into incapable hands as an opportunity to teach our kids to be wise stewards of their resources. And the way we’ll always make the right decision is to seek and follow God’s counsel. He won’t lead us into stinginess; there’ll be a really good reason when we say no, but the Holy Spirit will always steer us right. It’s also significant that the older son never lost anything through the whole ordeal.
- He was patient with his sons. How the dad stayed home during a famine in a nearby region where his son was likely to be, I don’t know. As an earthly dad, it shows his trust in God to take care of his son. As a symbol of Father God, it shows his patience to wait for his child to return to him in his hour of need. It’s been a difficult thing for me to release my kids to God’s care, instead of mine, when I knew they were making some foolish decisions. God once spoke to me concerning one of my kids whose life I wanted to involve myself and fix for them. He said, “The reason you feel like you need to fix this is because you don’t trust Me to do it.” From that moment I understood that God had a role that I couldn’t fill and I had the very small yet vital role of praying, trusting, and clearly showing love to my child.
- He remained mindful of his estranged son. He was obviously keeping a watchful eye out for his son’s much anticipated return. How else would he have seen him when he was still a long way off from home? A good father will never forget or neglect his children. He has a place in his heart that cannot become empty, no matter what. Those most pained parents who’ve lost a child know that’s true.
- He celebrated his son. There was plenty of need for correction and retraining. But the hour of his son’s return wasn’t the time for it. This was the time to celebrate that he still had his son, that he was alive, and he was home. It’s so easy to allow negative things to compromise celebration. Something I’ve learned is that when it’s time to celebrate, celebrate. There’s a time to deal with corrective matters, but it’s not during celebration. I learned that from Nehemiah, when he made the people stop weeping when they realized they had not been keeping God’s law. Essentially, he told them they would deal with their guilt later, but now was the time for joy and they couldn’t forfeit that because the joy of the Lord was their strength. As parents, we need to not muddy the waters for our kids. There are times when we want to affirm their very life, existence, and place in our family, and that’s not the time to talk about the bad report card or the speeding ticket.
- He was a peacemaker. Every decent father wants his kids to love each other and live in harmony with one another. Jesus expressed that as a top priority for us as children in the family of Christ, And we all want that for our own kids. The father in Luke 15 fielded his older son’s complaint by affirming that son’s rightful place as his heir while helping him see the value of having his younger brother alive and home.
Congratulations to our winner, the Father of the Prodigal Son! You’ve left us an awesome example of how to parent a prodigal child, how to parent a non-prodigal child, and how to parent both at the same time. Of course, you are a fictitional figure created by the Son of God and patterned after the Heavenly Father, so all the credit really goes to them. Of course, you won’t mind that. Given your known qualities, you’re doubtless a humble man, and you want credit to go where it’s due. Nevertheless, congrats to you. And thanks to God! And another congrats to all us fathers (and moms) who learn and apply your lessons!
