The Secret to a Great Marriage

Marriage is one of the most puzzling things on earth. How can a couple have a fulfilling marriage for life?

There’s no shortage of answers to that question; just search on YouTube and you’ll be inundated. But how many of those answers are truly helpful? Not many.

People are searching for the wrong kind of love. And therein lies the problem. The romantic, feeling driven love was created by the same God who created marriage, but it wasn’t intended to sustain for a lifetime. Its purpose is to attract two people who will soon move into a different kind of love. It’s that love that sustains our marriages for the decades that we live together in matrimony. That love is agape, from the Greeks, and it’s the best kept secret on earth. 

Agape-love is exactly the same thing as grace, and it truly is amazing. It’s what Jesus introduced to us by removing our sin with His sacrificial crucifixion-death. Agape-grace-love shows up in my marriage in this way: 

My dear wife, I have decided in advance to show you every kindness regardless of what you do or don’t do. You need not earn anything because I have decided to love you without regard to any circumstances. I stand ready to forgive and forget any wrong for which you may or may not be responsible. This is the love with which Jesus has loved me and is the love present in me with His Spirit. Since this love comes from God to me, how can I withhold it from you, my friend, my sister in Christ and my dear wife?

Two other really cool secrets.

First, a married couple who both live in grace toward each other will soon find themselves no longer lacking in the romantic love they once had. That’s right, the path back to marital romance is through grace. 

The second and final secret is this. Grace isn’t only the secret to a great marriage, it’s the secret to any relationship. God used it to make our relationships with Him awesome, and it’ll make friendships, business partnerships, parent-child and every other relationship the best they can be.

What’s the secret to a fulfilling marriage? In a word, grace.

And it’s Heaven’s best kept secret.