As Christians – recipients of grace – we sometimes give works a bad rap. We rightfully emphasize, as does the Bible, that we are saved by grace, not of works.
So, we cannot work to earn eternal life and right standing with God. That was done for us by Jesus; our part is to believe in and trust Jesus and His life’s sacrifice that He did all the work necessary for our salvation.
But just because works can’t win our salvation doesn’t mean works are futile. Good works still serve a wonderful purpose.
In 1 Corinthians 15, we find an important statement from Paul, a principle we can apply to marriage and most every other part of life. Verse 10 reveals Paul’s assertion that he has worked harder than any of the other apostles.
Now lest we think him arrogant or boasting, Paul offers two more ideas, one before and one after, that show his heart of humility. In verse 9 Paul states that he’s the least, not even worthy of being called an apostle, because he had persecuted Christians before He came to know Jesus, himself. In the latter part of verse 10 Paul clarifies that it’s actually God’s grace working through him, rather than Paul’s white-knuckling efforts.
So, when we consider our works, we must include the fact that even our works are actually God’s works.
I once heard Pastor Craig Groeschel preach a message based on Romans 15:10 as he spoke to church planters. He charged the group to never let someone out-work them. Craig emphasized the importance of leading by working hard; once your team sees your second-to-none work ethic, they’ll gladly follow your leadership.
We can apply this to marriage, as well, regardless of whether you’re the husband or the wife. We can take the competitive approach: don’t let your spouse out-work you. Or we can approach it by percentage, endeavoring to give 100% of what we have.
The point is to work extremely hard on our marriage, making it the best it can possibly be. Some of the most important work to be done for marriage are in these areas:
- Character building. As we apply Scripture to ourselves, we see qualities like quickness to forgive, patience with spouses, not giving up on them, and kindness in the way we think and act toward our spouse.
- Communication skills. Communication has been called the lifeblood of marriage. That’s a pretty good way to look at it. So much is determined by our communication or lack there of, so it’s wise to invest in both sending and receiving skills.
- Spousology. This is a made-up word meaning the studying of one’s spouse. Studying our spouse to best understand them is worthwhile work. It helps us know how to love them and relate to them.
Marriage is something Paul didn’t have. But since we do, let’s apply his hard work principle to our all important relationship with our spouse. Because work has power.
For I am the least of the apostles, who am not worthy to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me was not in vain; but I labored more abundantly than they all, yet not I, but the grace of God which was in me.
(1 Corinthians 15:9-10)